The summer of change has become the fall of fresh starts. Beth and I have found a church that we are attending while she finishes up her degree. Of course the next step is getting involved. For me, this is exciting and yet at the same time hard. For the first time in 11 years, I’m serving on a worship ministry that I am not overseeing. Last night was my first rehearsal playing drums with the team. I was excited about it, but there were of course some nerves. Do I still have the chops? Will I fit in with the team? What’s it going to feel like to not be calling the shots or running the rehearsal?
I can say with certainty that while there is definitely some rust on the chops, it was like taking a deep breath of fresh air. You see, for months I have been working through a lot of stuff (pain, hurt, uncertainty) with my life. Often times I admit that I’m probably working those things out through words as I have blogged more in the past 3 months than any other point in my blogger life. I don’t know that I can put it into words, but it was almost like for the first time in months, something was released in me. I’m hoping that I am entering the ‘Let it Go’ phase of my hurt. (Admit it, you’re singing it now, aren’t you?)
Here’s the most important part for me. I thought it would be difficult to be on the platform and not be ‘in charge.’ What made it so easy last night was that in my short time knowing the worship pastor, I have learned that he has the same passion for leading people into God’s presence that I do. So while I’m not the lead guy on stage, it is easy to feel a part of the team when you know that you share the same goal. (Matt, if you’re reading this, I’m not sucking up trying to get more playing time. Ha!) I could not be more serious about the importance of this aspect to me.
To all the members of the team, thank you so much for making me feel welcome from the outset. I had a blast and can’t wait to worship with you on Sunday. Life hasn’t gone according to plan lately, but I’m starting to feel good about starting over.